Went out to the family ranch outside of Imnotpostingitonline Montana this weekend where I could legally shoot either sex muley. I had dreams and aspirations of shooting a great big buck, so I could ridicule you bastards online. We arrived Friday night and as we were driving onto the ranch, Auto stated that I’ll have the best chances for deer if I wake up and hunt near the hay bales. Anyway, after staying up until 1:30 AM drinking 2/3 of a bottle of Blackberry Brandy plus beers with her 85ish year old grandpa, he has me convinced that I need to go to a different place. I figure it is his ranch, so I should listen to him and not my beloved wife.
After Miles woke me up at 4:30 AM because he wanted to go eat cat turds, and then woke me up again at 6 to go eat some more, I got out of bed blurry eyed and sharp as a butter knife. Miles then proceeded to run away and I whistled, cursed him, and called his name. After a bit, I give up and decided that I was going hunting. Figured I’d shoot either a deer or a lab.
It was still dark and I crunched the whole way on cottonwood leaves to where grandpa Earl had told me to go, and I had opportunities at a few does that I passed up. Then I climbed a hill and saw a couple little bucks with a bunch of does right next to the straw bales where Auto told me to go (there have been several I told you so’s, and she was right), put the sneak on them, had the buck in the picture at 100 yards broadside and I had a decent rest on a fencepost, so I thought to myself, self…you could pass this one up because there are bigger deer around, then again, I thought back to the year where I passed up a little 1X2, and then I never had another shot the rest of the season…so I shot him and Auto named him Hank.
The next morning, I went out to feed the dogs and take a leak, and sure enough there was a four point 50 yards from the back of the shop where I was relieving myself. He had his nose so far up this does cooter that he didn’t even notice me until Miles came looking for me and I had to restrain him from going after the deer. Oh well, he’ll be bigger next year and there will be smoked polish sausage and jerky in the freezer in a few days.
3 comments:
You forgot to mention a few key factoids from the weekend. How your wife put aside her love for LIVE animals (not dead ones) aside to help you drag Hank across the field, load him in the truck, hang him in the shop, load him back in the truck and hang him in the garage WITHOUT CRYING OR WHINING!
Oh and SELMA was the MVP of dogs this weekend. She even let a little kid jump up and down on her without even so much as a snarl.
I think I deserve a nice dinner - and Selma deserves a big beef rib bone, don't you?
Wow Ed! That deer is a bruiser. Good thing you bought a truck with a big bed!
Hank delmonico, Hank roast, Chicken fried Hank, Hank sandwiches, Hank chile, blackened Hank, Hank teriyaki, Stir fried Hank, and my personal favorite.....Hankebobs.
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